Nid d'poule city
by Stadakona
Summary: Hi! Montreal's here and... What the hell! What with the title! - *snickers* - Sam! What... Why did change my rubric's title AND cover! - At least, like that, your readers will have SOME truth among the lies you're abouth to tell - Why you... I'll let you know that I will be PERFECTLY honest in this Q&A rubric - Says the most corrupted city of the familly - *growl* (T for language)
1. Pothole WTF and siblings love

Yello people! Marie-Jeanne Tremblay here aka the Awesome Montréal aka the most important city of Canada.

*coughing from the west*

Okay, okay… second most important in Canada. *glares at Toronto* But still first in Québec!

Pardon?!

Oh, envouèye Sam, on sait tout que t'es p't'être ben la capital, mais t'es still just number two en importance. (Oh, come on Sam, we all know that you may be the capital, but your still just number two in importance.)

M'as t'en faire maudite- (Just you wait damn-)

Love ya too bra~

PIS ARRÊTE DE M'PARLER EN ANGLAIS! (AND STOP TALKING TO ME IN ENGLISH!)

So like I was saying before my "sweet" brother interrupted me *scowl* because, visibly, he's not satisfied in the fact his mere existence is ruining my life already…

Eille!

… the Awesome Montréal's here, your humble servitor to answer every and any questions you may have on me, my life, my past, my friends, my rivals, my familly… Put it simply: ANYTHING… as long as I don't have to black mail any of my friends and that it's Teen rated.

Pfff… parce que t'es pas perverse peut-être? Hypocrite- Ow! Tabarnak, c'est quoi ton osti problem?! (Pfff… because you're not a perverse maybe? Hypocrite- Ow! Tabarnak, what's your fucking problem?!)

*massaging her knuckles* Toé. (You)

Ç'pas une raison pour me frapper calisse! (That's not a reason to it me calisse!)

Oh, no, that was just for changing the name of my rubric for "pothole city" and my cover accordingly.

T'es une osti d'folle… (You're fucking crazy…)

And you should wash your mouth… *throw a soap bar (involuntary?) in his face*

Ow…

So, don't worry, Samuel won't be here next time~ Until then, send me questions because, well, that's what a Questions & Answers rubric is for. By PM please, I'd like to keep the comments sections for actual comments on my rubric. Thank you~ Bonne journée/Have a good day

Maudite folle… (Damn madwoman…)

* * *

**So, here. I felt like doing a Q&A rubric for my favorite OC : Montréal (Not from Montréal at all...) Hopefully, I'll be able to post at least once a week, but you most be patient with me okay? Okay!**

**Own nothing but my OCs (Mtl, T-R, and Qc-city... and this random Toronto)**

**Hetalia belongs to ****_Himaruya_**

**The provinces belongs to ****_ctcsherry_**


	2. Mais où est donc Carnior?

"_Mgfffll~_"

"_Do not speak with your mouth full Agwigos. I told you that THOUSANDS of times…_" *sighs*

*spit the envelope before her feet and start climbing on her leg* "_I said: Mail~_"

"_I swear if it is from the office again I wi-_"

"_It is from Amelige's home…_"

"_Alfred?_" *bent down and grab the letter* "_Still one of his party?_"

*nest in the front pocket of her hoody* "_I said Amelige's home, not FROM Amelige. As in from one of his people…_"

"_Eh? But why would I… Oh! I got one, I got one!_"

"_One…?_"

"_A question for my rubric!_"

"_Oh… Peanut?_"

"_Latter. I must answer to that question!_" *run in her office and lock the door so Sam won't get in…*

.~.~.~.~.

_Bonjour Montréal. Je suis Americaine et j'etudie le français et l'espagnol en l'école. C'est intéressant mais difficile pour moi. Conseils? (A.N. "I Montreal. I am an American and I study French and Spanish in school. It's interesting, but it's difficult for me. Advices?)_

_ (I apologize for the grammar mistakes and such. It's my first year in French and I haven't learned too much to be honest.) _

_ But apart from that, I'm curious to know... I understand that there's a significant variation between Canadian-French and French-French. Is it so different that I may not be able to communicate with the locals in Québec using the French I learned based on France? _

_ Merci._

_JulietGivesUp_

.~.~.~.~.

Hi Juliet! I can call you Juliet? Yeah? Cool!

First, let me thank for your question, it's really appreciated. I finally have something to rub in my brother! (Ah! Take that Sam! I knew this rubric would attract some one sooner or later!)

Secondly, your French is REALLY good for someone studying it since only ONE year. There were a few faults, but nothing so bad that I didn't understand. I could only dream of speaking English that well after the first year (learning French was a bit easier since we were only talking that at home with Papa and my brothers already knew how so they could help me. Immersion is hard, but it's the best way to learn!)

As for the piece of advice, I'd say to have fun while learning. How? Read French novels or comics, listen to movies and songs in French. The things you learn while having fun are those you'll remind the best. The first significant thing I said in French was a nursery rhyme after all. Except from that I only knew the few words and pseudo-sentences necessary for me to have food or comfort. Per contra, when you don't find any fun or pride in doing it, you don't learn well. For example, it took me a decade before learning English. (Well, that's what you get when you try teaching a freshly abandoned child your language by yelling after him Kirkland!) Then I discovered the fun of spying on the British Idiot and my mind on English changed~

The most important thing is to never give up. Learn a new language is hard, but the pride of knowing it worth the trouble. You'll have more open door than with only English. You can always go in France with only English and get by, but speaking the language is so much better. In Rome be a Roman they say!

As for your second question, there is a difference between my French and Papa's French, but it's mostly in the pronunciation of words. Our words are not THAT different. It's pretty much like USA and England in fact.

The thing is, here in Québec, we still talk a French close to the Colonial French aka mostly the Royal French (mixed with Normand dialect). After the French Revolution, Papa's bosses decided to standardize his language and make it different from the Royal French. Still we already belonged to England at that epoch, we weren't affected by this transition. That's why we still 'use' the 'royal word' _toé (you) _while the good word (that we also mostly use in Québec because it's Standard French… and prettier) is _toi_. _Toé _is mostly heard in moment of _bad passion_ (fight, argument and the like).

Most of these 'old words' are used in what we call _Joual_, an informal speech (born in Montréal ^^) once used by the laborers and now corresponding to every words judged 'Purely Québécois'. Most Québécois knows Joual, but don't speak it in their everyday life, just like me and my brothers. Some words are more used, but we tend to eliminate them in formal discussions. The only big difference resides in some words like, for instance, "chialer" that, while in my speech means "to complain", means "to cry" in Papa's not-that-formal speech. The equivalent word in Québécois for "to cry" would be "brailler", which I think means "to scream" in France…

But, we always end up understanding French-French here in Québec (by experience I can say the opposite is not always true…) After all, we still have a lot of French-French translation amongst our TV shows and Novels, so we don't really have the choice. If you're REALLY worried about that, know that there is PLANTY of French-French/Québécois dictionary existing. And, also, know that Québécois French is just like American English: Each region have is accent and specificity, yet we all share a common language that allows us to understand each other, aka Standard French.

**"Et surtout, oublie pas les trucs magiques! Mordre et Mordu ainsi que Mais où est donc Carnior~" (And, mostly, don't forget the magic tricks! To bite and bitten and also Mais où est donc Carnior~ (But or and so Ifneitheryet... That doesn't make sense at all in English XD))**

.~.~.~.~.

"Hein? Agwigos? Tu parles français maintenant?!" (Hein? Agwigos? You speak French now?!)

"_No, I do not…"_

_"But you just-"_

_"Peanut?"_

_"Yeah… Whatever…"_

* * *

**So, yep, here it is, my first question, my first answer~ I had a lot of fun answering this one ***cough*inmybiologyclass…*cough* **since the origin and particularity of my language is really a subject fascinating me! ^^**

**By the way, the 'Mordu/Mordre' thing is a trick commonly used by French Speaker to know if a verb most end with '-er' like a infinitive verb or with "-é" like in ****_composed past._**** Example: For the sentence "****_Julie aime manger des poires_****", you can say "****_Julie aime _****_mordre_****_ des poires_****" but not "****_Julie aime _****_mordu_****_ des poires_****". It doesn't make sense!**

**As for "****_Mais où est donc Carnior?_****" ****_Mais_****, ****_Ou_****, ****_Et_****, ****_Donc_****, ****_Car_****, ****_Ni_**** and ****_Or _****are the seven most used conjunctions in French. The French-French equivalence of this sentence is "****_Mais où est donc Orcarni?_****" which is pretty much the same XD**

**Yep, we know our language is hard so we have tricks to aid us… A LOT!**

**Hope it helped you~**


	3. Little Mountain d'Amour

"_Hochelaga…_"

"Oui, je sais, c'est un idi-" ("Yes, I know, it's a idi-")

"_Hochelaga…_"

"Oui Addagnin, je sais que tu fais des efforts et qu-" (Yes Addagnin (_Big Brother_), I know that you're making efforts and th-")

"_…_"

*soupir* "Pourquoi tu t'trouve pas quelqu'un d'aut- … Ok, ok, pète pas ta coche je fesais juste dire … Oui, bon, je sais que tu- … D'accord, j'le dirait pas, mais c'est peut-être ça qui vous manque justement de vous l'admettre…" ("Why don't who find yourself someone els- … Ok, ok, don't get like that, I was just saying … Yes, well, I know that you- … Alright I won't say it, but maybe that's exactly what you're missing, to admit it to each other…")

*growl*

*scoff* "Ouais, bien sûr, c'est juste pour le cul- … Sérieusement, je n'avais pas et ne VOULAIT pas savoir ça…" ("Yeah, sure, it just for the sex- … seriously, I didn't need nor WANT to know that…") *groan* "_I do not care how good he is in bed, I do not believe you._" *laugh* "_Of course I do not, and I will speak in Mohawk if I want thank you very much … Why, well, simple, you are telling me that you chose THE Ontarians representative as a boy toy while we both know that you would have wilder sex with a monk! … Ah! _Too Much Information_ again! … Anyw-_"

*Breath in* "_HOCHELAGA!_"

"Oh! Agwigos… _Ok, it seems urgent. _J'te rappelled plus tard Kebek, essais de penser à ce que j'ai dit en attendant. _Yeah, I love you too… even if you are an idiot._" ("I'll call you latter Kebek, try to think about what I told you during this time.") *chuckle* "Bebye"("Bye Bye") *turns to the chipmunk* "_Yes?_"

"_Your flat thingy his making weird noises again…_"

"_My flat thingy… Oh, you mean my cell phone!_"

"_Yeah, whatever…_" *walks away to… do whatever a millennia years old chipmunk do in his life*

"Ok…" *look at it* "Yeah, une autre!" ("Yeah, another!")

.~.~.~.~.

Thank you for replying to my last post. I loved reading your response and I'm glad you enjoyed answering my question.

As for your advice about immersing into the French (French-Canadian) culture, I absolutely adore francophone singers. My favorite artist so far, I believe, lives in you... err, there... - Montréal! Elle s'apelle 'cœur de pirate.' Est-ce que vous la connaissez ? Elle est magnifique. Incroyable chanson!

Also, thank you for the reassurance. You see, my mother and I are planning to go to Canada this summer and she's entrusting me to use my French-speaking skills (regardless of how very limited it is) to get around the city. Hopefully I can get along fine before instantly resorting to French/English tourist gibberish. I certainly don't want to resort to "Parlez vous anglais, monsieur?" too quickly.

One more thing. Since it's your city, where do you recommend we visit? (This question applies to Toronto also!)

JulietGivesUp

.~.~.~.~.

Hi again Juliet, I'm glad my last answer pleased you. (You're my only reviewer after all, so I must make sure to respond to you correctly eh?)

**_It is almost sad_**

_Shut up Agwigos! _Eh eh… ^^'

Anyway, yeah, I do know Coeur de pirate, and also, yeah, she's from here. Thank for correcting by the way, it IS in me, indeed, but I don't like to say it like that, it looks like I ate my people… I do like her too.

As for your visiting, YEAH! Don't worry, my people are mostly bilingual, so I'm sure you'll manage in English if you really don't find your words in French. We do have a lot of tourist, business men/women and artists coming in Montréal each year. I do, after all, own a lot of film sets used by Hollywood herself (well, her people). So don't worry, but I'm pretty sure you'll manage in French if it's already as good as I can read ^^

So, hum, attractions… well, there is a lot of thing you can do at my place. I am, after all, one of the most partygoer cities of the country, and this time Toronto can't denied it! Come on, the gal goes to sleep at 10 o'clock on SATURDAY! Ridiculous…

It all depends on when you come… If it's during winter, you can visit one of my MANY museums: Le Musée des Beaux Arts, the Science Center, McCord Museum and my Natural Sciences museums (Biôdome (Animals), Insectarium (Insects), Jardin Botanique (Plants… better in summer because of the outdoor gardens) and, freshly from this year, the Planétarium (Space and the like). Pointe-à-Callière is a must in my point of view, since it's my Biographie in the form of a unique museum: An archeological museum. Archeologist once studied the Pointe-à-Callière (not the most agreeable feeling in the world, I tell you) to learn more about my past. When they had finish, instead of filling the hole and forget it, they turned it into a museum, so you can now wander between the remains of Papa's and mine people first construction. Cool eh? The archeologist students of the Université de Montréal are actually digging what will eventually be the new wing of the museum right now. My brother Samuel almost got the same thing, but his boss decided to keep is money for more "exciting thing" (*cough*theNordiques*cough*).

While being there, you can visit the Old Town and the Port. Most streets and buildings are still of epoch. If you pay attention, you may even see the white slabs marking the old locations of some buildings: the OLD Cathédrale Notre-Dame (in front of the actual one), Vaudreuil's castle (in the middle of the Place Jacques-Cartier), etc.

I'm also hosting MANY festivals during the whole year:

In winter: Montréal en lumière (and La Nuit Blanche), the Fête des Neiges, the Art Souterrain exposition (which is a good occasion the visit my Underground City, the largest underground network in the world!) if only to name some.

In Summer I have: the Just for Laugh festival, the Jazz festival, the Francofolie festival, Heavy MTL festival, Otakuthon (where me and my brothers have a real great time looking at the Hetalia cosplayers… we also love to ask stupid questions in the panels… anyway…). There also, I only named some.

The Mont Royal's park is also to visit, its concept was made by the same guy whom made Central Park (yeah, only the best for my little mountain d'amour~ 3)

**_She really loves this place…_**

_Come on Agwigos, you love it to._

**_Not since you told people to stop feeding the animals. The peanuts were good…_**

_They were the exact same things then what I buy you…_

Speaking of park, there is also the Parc Jean-Drapeau who is vice to visit and have a picnic in/on (it's an island). You can also find La Ronde on this island, my attraction park. Since it's close on winter, if you came in the time of Addath (my father: Snow), visit one of the sugar shacks to taste to taste Copper Gold of Québec: Maple Sugar~

All in all, there is much to do at my place; you won't have enough of one journey to do it all. As for Toronto, well ask her, it's not like I care about her sh**. In fact, every time I think about her tourist attractions, I think about CN Tower, which makes me think about this song Oliver sang this one time and… Oh God! The image! That's it, I need a brain bleach NOW! *run away*

**_My master wants to thank you for your question, but she is now, hum… preoccupied…_**

*sob while listening LOUDLY to _Versailles _(gift from Hiroshima)*

**_Wow… the Japanese one? Seriously?_**** *whistle*****_ That is a bad case. _*****join her to try and help her***

*Rock in a corner*

* * *

**Poor Montréal… Yeah, things are better left on seen/heard. For those who are curious anyway, the song I'm talking about is this: www. youtube watch?v= MtYYn_wQm-k (Men, does Ontario sang off key)**

**Don't forget to ask question, this "story" can't exist without them**

**Versaille, by the way, is a Japanese Visual Kai/Symphonic Metal group **


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